Fastest shower in the West

Fastest shower in the West

Long gone are the days where I could put Ava in her bouncy seat to play happily in the bathroom with me while I took a leisurely shower.

These days I am lucky if I get 30 seconds alone before she tears open the curtain in hot pursuit of me.

See, I put her in our bedroom on the floor, complete with some toys to entertain her (thinking this will buy me some time – ha!), and I make a mad dash to the bathroom (which is connected), stripping off my clothes as I go. I throw the water on and jump in (it doesn’t even have a chance to warm up, but I think that helps me move all the faster). I generally have just enough time to wet my hair before I see the curtain rustling and then her little face peering in at me.

And so my showers (at least during weekdays) are very short and to the point. No time to relax and let the water massage my back. No time to shave my legs (hey, it goes with my whole hippie image anyway, LOL, j/k). I’m lucky to get my hair shampooed, my body soaped up and my pits shaved.

Thank God for the person who invented leave-in conditioner. One less thing I need to do while in the shower. ;)


  1. Yes, yes, yes, that sounds so familiar! I actually kept a bouncy seat in the bathroom for this reason and it was a sad, sad day when I had to remove it. I don’t know how large your bathroom is, but I’ve just started bringing him and his toys in with me; my “sneaking” away piques his curiosity more than hearing me speak to him through the curtain.

  2. I tell you, I was unable to have a decent shower until I had a kid old enough to entertain the baby (meaning, 2 kids needed). I still don’t shower alone–someone is always coming in to brush teeth, go potty, etc. One day, I will shower alone. One day………

  3. Ooh. Leave-in conditioner. That’s a good time saving idea.

    I usually have to take a shower before they wake up. I do have those times when they wake while I’m showering, pull open the curtain and start pointing at my privates, laughing away.

    Gotta love kids.

  4. Showers? Alone? That’s what 2 a.m. is for. ::yawn::

  5. Thanks for all the comments. :)

    Ya know, I’ve tried taking her in the shower with me – figured she can splash around in the water while I bathe – but that was a no-go. She started crying as soon as the water came on.
    And I’ve tried just leaving her on the bathroom floor, but she has no interest in playing when mommy is in the shower. So at least when I leave her in the bedroom I have a 30 second head-start. ;)

  6. Lol. It does get better at some point Unfortunately for me, I started getting too comfortable with the whole mother hood thing when my only was 5. I “blocked out” the bad. So came my second, then my third 19 months later. Now that the baby is not needing to nurse every 30 minutes I can actually take a BATH. BUT, but but but, I have to SNEAK in to the bathroom and shut the door before I start the water so they will not be clamoring to climb in with me. I got my fill of that living at my IL’s house. Lol. My oldest(who is 10) is good about watching them for 20 minutes while I bathe. Ahhhh, if it werent for my 10 year old I think I would have lost it at times.

  7. Glad to hear there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. :)

    My dh does occasionally let me take bathes on week nights. It goes something like this.
    Me: “Here’s the baby. I’m taking a bath.”
    Him: “OK”

  8. One of my sisters and I call those types of showers: Slut Baths. In and out. Quick.

    It’s become part of our family culture, I often tell Guy “I need to take a Slut Bath before you leave” and the scary thing is, he knows exactly what I mean. LOL

  9. I completely empathize. Every three or four days I get to take a shower. Otherwise its just an A.P.C. (armpits and crotch) at the sink. Thank heavens for ponytail holders!

  10. OMG you guys, I didn’t know there were names for the things we do to “get the essentials” clean–Slut baths and APC. SUH-WEET!

  11. Slut baths – I love it! Dh said that’s what he’s going to call them from now on. Uh, great?

    And as for APCs, we used to call them “3-point baths” when I was growing up. I’d forgotten about that. LOL :)

  12. Ninotchka – I was watching Reno911 last night and someone referred to going home and taking a quick slut batch. If it weren’t for you, I’d never have known!

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