I wrote about my unhappiness over this nearly a year ago and, other than some minor things, I did not do much to work on it over the past year. However, in 2009, I am swearing I will do something. I can’t keep ignoring my problems and my past and treating the people I love in a way that goes against everything I believe in. I am going to seek out a counselor/therapist/psychologist/head shrinker/whatever you want to call it and start therapy.
Yes, my big goal for 2009 is to take care of my mental and emotional health. I have shied away from seeking therapy in the last few years because I don’t want to dredge up old memories, feelings, etc. It’s so much easier to repress them and live in denial, but it’s taking it’s toll on the little people who matter the most to me – my children. I’ve also had logistical
excuses issues – who will watch the kids while I saw a therapist?
But that’s it – NO more excuses. I don’t want to be that person. I know I can do better. I think that by dealing with the past rather than forgetting it I can be a better mom, a better wife, a better sister and daughter and a better friend.
It will likely be a slow process. One day at a time. One step at a time. But the important part is that the process is started. I’m ready.
And I figure by documenting it here, you all can hold me accountable. If I don’t write about my new therapist in another month or two, feel free to get on my case. ;)
What is YOUR big goal for 2009?
I want to wish you all a Happy and Healthy New Year. Thanks for sticking with me and being a part of Crunchy Domestic Goddess! :)