Help me determine the future of this blog

It’s been nearly 5 years since I started my blog and while it’s grown a lot in that time over the past year I’ve definitely not been obsessing over tending to my blog as much as I used to. It’s not that I don’t have topics that I want to write about, but that I’ve been focusing more on myself personally lately instead of blogging like a fiend writing as much as I’d like to.

For those of you who’ve been around for a while, those of you who are brand new to my blog or those of you who fall somewhere in between, I’d like to know what would YOU like to see happen with this blog? What types of posts do you enjoy the most – parenting, green living, personal posts about my life, childbirth, mental health, pics of my adorable kids (LOL had to throw that in there), current events, food, gardening, photography (oh yeah, I used to take pictures, didn’t I?), other topics that I haven’t yet addressed on my blog, etc.? What do you enjoy the least (please don’t say pics of my kids)? :P What do you like or want to read about on Crunchy Domestic Goddess?

Also, at times I’ve mulled over the idea of taking on a couple other writers for my blog, simply because there’s no way I alone can possibly write about all of the things that are happening in all of these topics. I’ve hesitated to do this because I think I may lose readers or my street cred or something like that. It also may be because I’m a bit of a control freak and that would mean I have to relinquish some of my control. What are your thoughts about having a few other writers than myself for this blog? Would you read their posts? Would you want to be a contributor? Would you think I’m “selling out?” Would you delete me from your feed reader? ;)

Talk to me my amazing, smart, gorgeous, talented readers. Tell me what you’d like to see happen with this blog. I won’t say I’ll leave it all up to you (‘cuz I’m a control freak, remember?), but I’d love to get some feedback and constructive criticism. Thank you! I truly appreciate it. :)

I plan to get another post up tomorrow reflecting on the past year and stating some of my goals for 2010, but if I don’t (‘cuz ya just never know), then thank you for sticking with me through the thick and thin and HAPPY, HAPPY NEW YEAR to you! :)

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Mint (candy cane) chocolate chip cookies recipe

I hope everyone had a good Christmas, Hanukkah, Solstice, Yule or whatever it is that you celebrate. :) We had a good holiday here in the Crunchy Domestic Goddess house. The kids enjoyed their presents and even playing with the packaging. There’s nothing wrong with upcycling your cardboard. ;) In addition to the masks, Ava built a cardboard house for Strawberry Shortcake and Lemon Meringue.

I got a new set of stainless steel pots and pans and am happy to finally rid myself of the old Teflon (non-stick) set (that I had no idea was potentially bad for us when I got it many years ago). I also got a beautiful enameled cast iron pot. I could be contentedly busy in the kitchen for hours now and may be on the lookout for some new recipes :)

That brings me to the point of this post – a new recipe! If you are like me, you might have some candy canes hanging around (literally) and may be looking for a use for them (other than stuffing them into your mouth). I was inspired to come up with this recipe after Jennifer mentioned she and her daughter had experimented with candy cane cookies.

They are delicious and will be consumed before you know it! You might want to stock up on some candy canes so you can make them at other times of the year too, though I think substituting peppermint candy for the candy canes would work just as well.

Mint (candy cane) chocolate chip cookies


  • 2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 cup (2 sticks) butter, softened
  • 3/4 cup granulated sugar
  • 3/4 cup packed brown sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 1/2 teaspoon mint extract
  • 2 large eggs
  • 2 cups chocolate chips (12-oz. pkg.)
  • 1 cup candy canes ground finely in food processor (about 10-12 candy canes)


PREHEAT oven to 375° F.

COMBINE flour, baking soda and salt in small bowl. Beat butter, granulated sugar, brown sugar and vanilla and mint extracts in large mixer bowl until creamy. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in chocolate chips, followed by candy canes. Drop by rounded tablespoon onto ungreased baking sheets.
Please note: Due to the melting candy canes, these cookies tend to spread a bit. Make sure you leave adequate space surrounding each cookie on the baking sheets.

BAKE for 9 to 11 minutes or until golden brown. Cool on baking sheets for 2 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool completely. Enjoy!

I’d post a picture of the cookies, but we ate them all (and gave some to the kids’ teachers). I may be making another batch soon though and will add a pic if I do. ;)

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Joy Szabo Travels 350 Miles for Vaginal Birth

Joy Szabo recently drew nationwide attention when she refused to have a repeat cesarean section at her local Page, Arizona, hospital. Instead, Joy and her husband Jeff decided that Joy (alone) would move 350 miles from home to Phoenix where they could, according to CNN, get “the birth they wanted” – a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC). Many are calling Joy’s vaginal birth a victory, but Jenn at Knitted in the Womb acknowledges that while on one level getting the VBAC is a victory, on a larger scale she wonders was it really a victory?

Photo courtesy CNN
Photo courtesy CNN

Here’s a little history. While seven months pregnant with her fourth child, Joy Szabo was told by her local hospital that she would be required to have a repeat cesarean section rather than allow her to have the birth she wanted, a VBAC. It didn’t matter that she had already had one VBAC at this hospital, the policy had changed and VBACs were no longer permitted there.

VBACs carry a less-than-1-percent increased risk of a uterine rupture, which could cause brain damage in the baby or even death, according to the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecologists.”

According to CNN:

After their discussion with their doctor, the Szabos made an appointment to speak with Page Hospital’s CEO, Sandy Haryasz. When the couple told her about their desire for a vaginal birth, they say Haryasz would not budge, even telling them she would get a court order if necessary to ensure Joy delivered via C-section.

The Szabos thought that seemed extreme and rather than succumb to the hospital’s new policy, a few weeks before her due date Joy moved into a Phoenix apartment 350 miles away from her husband and three children while she waited to go into labor. At the Phoenix hospital Joy gave birth to her fourth son Marcus Anthony in an “uncomplicated vaginal delivery.”

Emily from Laundry and Lullabies said, “Joy, you’re an inspiration. Thank you for standing up for yourself, for bringing attention to the state of maternity care in America, and for making it just a bit easier for other women to follow your example.”

Danielle who blogs at Birth, Babies & Everything In Between believes VBAC is much safer for healthy, low risk women than elective repeat cesareans. She likes to use the example of Michelle Duggar to demonstrate the safety of VBAC. Michelle has had four c-sections and 13 VBACs and recommends the organization International Cesarean Awareness Network (ICAN) for those wishing to gain information about VBAC.

On the Duggar’s website, Michelle describes how things have changed from her first pregnancy to her 18th.

I would say the greatest change that I have seen in the field of obstetrics, and I might add that it is very troubling to me, is the idea that once you’ve had a C-section you must have a C-section for any other pregnancy. It is much healthier for mom and baby to avoid major surgery and all the complications that go along with a C-section if possible. Granted, there are health situations that would warrant such, but for years obstetrics encouraged TOL (Trial Of Labor after previous C-section) with many successful healthy vaginal births. It was quite alarming to be told that I could no longer have a vaginal birth due to hospital or insurance companies regulations. It appears that what is best for the patient is not the priority with this decision. I feel our health care is being jeopardized by this unhealthy approach. Doctors are having to tell their patients that they no longer offer VBAC assistance due to hospital regulations and some might even state to the patient that they are not safe so as to avoid confrontation. Statistics prove much differently. For the many women that find themselves in this situation, ICAN is an organization that is very helpful in gaining more information on this topic.

Jenn at Knitted in the Womb, who I mentioned above and questions the “victory” aspect, says:

I am glad that Joy got a vaginal birth, and on that level the birth was a victory. But on the larger scale level…the extreme hoops she had to go through make it less than that. The “victory” that I see missing is an acknowledgment by the Page Hospital administration that A) VBAC is safe and B) even if they disagree with “A,” they have no right to force a person to have surgery. For a woman who does not have the financial means to do what Joy did – move away from her home for over a month – surgery is still a forced situation.

…this could easily be used by hospital administrators as “precedent.” “You want a VBAC? So sorry, we don’t offer that here. Do what Ms. Szabo did, go move to be near ‘hospital X.’”

I agree with Jenn in that the CNN article headline, “Mom fights, gets the delivery she wants” is misleading. When I first read it, I expected that Joy Szabo had fought the Page hospital and had her VBAC there. I wasn’t expecting that she had to move six hours from her home, leaving her children and husband, to get a VBAC at another hospital.

Yes, the fact that she got a vaginal birth is a victory, but this story also shows that birth advocates still have a lot of work ahead of them. As more hospitals ban VBACs, there will be more and more cases of women who are forced to make difficult choices.

The fact that this situation got the national attention that it did, that CNN covered it and posted “some tips for what to ask your doctor (or midwife) in the delivery room if the suggestion is made that it’s time to give up on a vaginal birth and head to the operating room” is a step in the right direction. It might not be the big victory that many of us are hoping for, but it’s a small victory and that counts too.

Related posts:

Cross-posted on BlogHer.

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Dear Target – a thank you letter

It’s no secret that I’ve harped on Target in the past. First there were the epidural maternity shirts, then there was the incident where the police were called on a breastfeeding mother. This weekend, however, Target did something that has me very thankful, and while I already informally expressed my thanks to them on Twitter, I wanted to do so a little more formally here.

It happened on Saturday – the last weekend before Christmas – when Jody and I decided to take the kids to Target so they could each pick out a present to give to the other. I thought it would help them learn the joy of giving, rather than just receiving on Christmas.

Before we went into the store, we emphasized that the store would be very busy with lots of people and the kids were to stay with us at all times. (You can see where this is headed, can’t you?)

Jody and I each took a kid and headed for the toy section as the kids searched for the perfect gift for their sibling (and got distracted with what they wanted for themselves at least 20 times). At one point, I turned a corner and glanced behind me with 3-year-old Julian nowhere to be seen. My heart jumped into my throat as I quickly retraced my steps and found him just around the corner playing with a toy. Whew!

Eventually, the sibling gifts were chosen.

I wanted to buy some art supplies for the kids, so Jody took the kids and planned to let them pick out something for me while I shopped for them.

I found what I wanted and began moseying around the store to find them. That’s when I saw Jody, alone, looking frantic as he dodged in and out of maternity clothes racks.

“Where are the kids??”

Jody told me he couldn’t find Julian and had told Ava to stay in one spot with the cart while he looked for Jules.

My first thought was to go to the guest services desk and let them know Julian was missing. The more people looking for him, especially on such a busy day, the better. Jody, however, apparently had the same thought at the same time and beat me to the desk.

I ditched my cart (and my purse – totally wasn’t thinking) and started looking for Julian myself.

Within seconds, crimson-clad Target employees were combing the aisles in force. Within two minutes, an employee asked me if I was the mom with the lost child (was the crazy “Oh my God, where is my son?” look in my eye that obvious?) and said they had found him and they would bring him to guest services.

Thank. God.

As I quickly walked to find Jody and tell him Julian had been found, I heard another employee say, “Oh! They are chasing after him!” And I could picture Julian screaming and crying and running away from the people who were trying to help him. Poor buddy.

I ran over to where Jody and Ava were already headed and met up with them to find a crying Julian safe in Jody’s arms. I kissed and hugged him and was so relieved to see he was OK. We let him know how scared we were that he was lost and it was obvious how scared he was too. (He had apparently run away from Jody looking for me when he got lost.)

It was about that time that I remembered that I’d ditched my cart with my purse in it. I was relieved to find it was all right where I left it.

I can’t tell you how thankful I am that our story had a happy ending.

Thank you, local Target employees, for springing into action so quickly and helping my husband and me find our son.

What To Do If Your Child Is Missing:

If your child ever goes missing in a store, notify the front desk or an employee ASAP. Most stores have a “Code Adam” procedure (named after Adam Walsh, the 6-year-old son of John Walsh, who was abducted from a Sears department store in Florida in 1981 and later found murdered) that alerts the employees to look for the missing child. If the child is not located within 10 minutes, the police are called.


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Time magazine advocates “tough love” approach to infant sleep

Time magazine recently published a section called The Year in Health, A to Z in the Dec. 7, 2009 issue. The letter B is for Babies and what Time advised regarding babies, “tough love” and sleep has many people shaking their heads in disagreement.

The article states:

When a baby has repeated problems falling asleep, Mom and Dad may need to show some tough love. Lingering with cranky babies too long or bringing them into the parents’ bedroom can make them likelier to become poor sleepers, according to psychologist Jodi Mindell, who gathered data on nearly 30,000 kids up to 3 years old in 17 countries. “If you’re rocked to sleep at bedtime, you’re going to need that every time you wake up,” she notes. Her advice: have children fall asleep 3 ft. away. “If they’re slightly separated, they sleep much better,” she says.

Parents, pediatricians and proponents of attachment parenting strongly disagree with Time’s advice.

On Attachment Parenting International, Samantha Gray, executive director of Attachment Parenting International, and Barbara Nicholson and Lysa Parker, founders of API, published the letter to the editor they wrote in response. Here is a bit of it:

Contrary to the very unfortunate and detrimental advice on sleep in Time magazine, API’s Principle outlines the need to be responsive to children during the night and not to brush aside their needs as inconsequential to them or to their development in the name of “tough love.” The magazine and this proponents’ advice is framed in such a way to alarm parents into unfounded fears about their children being poor sleepers if they respond in loving ways such as rocking their child, breastfeeding, or lying down with the child. We know, in fact, that these practices are not only healthy for the child, but, for the very short period of a child’s life that needs are met in this way, parent and child benefit.

Science indicates that a comforting nighttime approach helps children achieve healthy sleep habits. Research and the experience of parents throughout the ages have proven that effective nighttime parenting includes prompt, calm response, as well as holding, cuddling and soothing touch.

We pray no one takes to heart this advice you have quite surprisingly chosen to publish, all the more in the midst of the availability of substantial quality parenting information. This advice goes against parents’ good instincts to care for their very young child in the ways their inner knowing tells them to.

We implore Time to urgently correct this harmful information in such a way to command even greater attention than received by the original article. Our children are worth it, and so are their parents.

At the time of this posting, Time had not responded to API nor published any sort of correction.

Pediatrician, father of eight, and author of numerous parenting books Dr. William Sears suggests in his own letter to the editor to Time:

Rather than issuing rules or cautions about being “over attached” concerning nighttime parenting we should be encouraging parents to sleep safely and closely with their babies. In my experience and that of others who have thoroughly researched the issue of co-sleeping, namely Dr. James McKenna, babies who sleep close to their parents sleep physiologically healthier and a mutual trust develops between parents and child.

Remember, we have an epidemic of insomnia in this country necessitating a mushrooming of sleep disorder clinics. When babies start out life with a healthy sleep attitude, that sleep is a pleasant state to enter and a fear-less state to remain in they’re more likely to grow up with a healthy sleep attitude and both children and their parents will sleep better later on.

On his website, Dr. Sears has 8 Infant Sleep Facts Every Parent Should Know including:

  • babies have shorter sleep cycles than adults
  • there are developmental and survival benefits of nightwaking
  • and as babies grow, they achieve “sleep maturity.”

Kayris who blogs at The Great Walls of Baltimore said, “considering the amount of adults who suffer from sleep problems or use sleep aid medications, I’m truly surprised at the amount of people who expect sleep to also be easy for children.”

Micki AKA ADDHousewife is one of those people who has trouble sleeping and said in response to the Time article, “That’s pure crazy. Some kids are just lousy sleepers. Plain and simple. I am still a bad sleeper!”

Hannah Gaiten, owner of Natural Choices, had this response to Time’s article:

That type of position is based on what is perceived to be best for parents, not taking into account what is truly best for the kids, in my opinion. Heaven forbid a child need to nurse to sleep…why is it regarded as such a “problem?” We do it everyday, every time my daughter needs to sleep, she needs to nurse. Sure, it’s not the most convenient at times, but if I were looking for convenience, then perhaps being a parent wasn’t the best road to take.

To make a blanket statement like, “If they’re slightly separated, they sleep much better” is unwise, in my opinion – each child is different and instead of this author telling parents how to parent their child, they should give unbiased information and encourage the parents to do what is best for their family (not just what is in the best interest of the parents).

Susan, who blogs at Two Hands Two Feet agrees, “I hate it when ‘experts’ tell parents what is best for them and their kids. You need to do what is right for your family, not what an expert says. This stuff caused me a lot of grief when my girls were tiny. I read books because I didn’t feel like I knew what I was doing. But what I really should have done was just gone with my instincts.”

Suzanne at The Joyful Chaos who co-sleeps, but also says she’s “not actually an advocate for co-sleeping,” drives the point home that you have to do what works best for your family in her post The Cosleeping Edition of my Attachment Parenting Freako-ness and sometimes that may very well differ from child to child.

A Mother In Israel Hannah asks in her post Sleep Training at the 92nd St. Y:

Are our babies robots? Or dogs that we need to train? No, they are very small people who can’t understand why everyone ignores them once the sun goes down, even when they cry hard enough to throw up. A baby’s cry is intended to be disturbing. If we train ourselves to ignore it, we lose our instinctive rachmanut (compassion). And a baby whose cries are ignored learns that his feelings don’t count for much. Eventually he will give up and go to sleep, but pay a steep price.

Who are we to say that our need for a solid eight hours (which we usually don’t get anyway for all kinds of trivial reasons) trumps the baby’s needs? Adults can learn to cope with less sleep and babies need concern and sympathy no matter when they are in distress. Trust your baby; she will tell you when s/he is developmentally ready to fall asleep without your help.

As for my opinion, I think it’s very irresponsible for Time to make a blanket statement like that, especially when there is evidence that proves the contrary is true. I do believe it is up to each family to decide what works best for them and their children. While I don’t think it’s for everyone, co-sleeping worked for my family for years. Nowadays my children are still co-sleeping with each other at age 3 and 5 and sleep side by side in a room together. Just as they have different personalities, they are very different sleepers. My daughter has a harder time falling asleep than my son, but both are parented to sleep in a way that works best for them.

There’s nothing that is convenient about being a parent. It is a physically, emotionally and mentally taxing job. Parenting doesn’t end just because the sun sets. It’s a 24/7 365 days of the year job.

Instead of trying to put more distance between parents and their children, I think Time should be encouraging more connections. The time that our children are infants and toddlers is so fleeting in the grand scheme of things, we should be embracing them, not pushing them away.

Jan Hunt, director of The Natural Child, points out, “As the writer John Holt put it so eloquently, having feelings of love and safety in early life, far from ‘spoiling’ a child, is like ‘money in the bank’: a fund of trust, self-esteem and inner security they can draw on throughout life’s challenges.

Children may be small in size, but they are as fully human as we are, and as deserving as we are to be trusted to know what they need, and to have their voices heard.”

There is a wealth of information about infant sleep on Attachment Parenting International’s Baby Sleep Strategies page, including infant sleep safety, co-sleeping, nighttime parenting and more.

Annie at PhD in Parenting also has an informational post Gentle Baby and Toddler Sleep Tips that “provides tips for sleep deprived parents that want their babies to sleep better and… do not want to use the cry it out approach.”

If you’d like to respond to Time about “B” for Babies, please do so online using their letter to the editor web form or snail mail to:
TIME Magazine Letters
Time & Life Building
New York, N.Y. 10020
“Letters should include the writer’s full name, address and home telephone and may be edited for purposes of clarity and space.”

Cross-posted at BlogHer.

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