Welcome to the October Carnival of Breastfeeding hosted by The Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog. This month’s theme is a little different than past carnivals, in that this month we all wrote “This I believe” essays on topics related to breastfeeding and parenting. Please visit the participating bloggers listed at the bottom of this post.

Trusting my parenting instincts

I believe in attachment parenting or - a name that I like even better - parenting by instinct.

I believe in breastfeeding my children for the countless health benefits as well as the emotional benefits to both me and them. I also believe that children know when they are ready to wean from the breast and I’m doing my best to allow that to happen for us. There are times I’ve given a gentle push in the weaning direction (with Ava, not at all with Julian yet), but I’m hoping I can allow my children to give it up completely when they feel they are ready.

I believe that co-sleeping with my kids and nighttime parenting helps strengthen the bond between my husband Jody, myself and our kids.

I believe in wearing my babies or holding them in arms. I believe that the closeness and security stimulates them far more than being left lying alone does.

I believe in responding to my baby’s cries. I believe that babies cry because they have a need that is not being met - either they are hungry, uncomfortable (wet, too cold, too warm), or they simply need comforting and reassurance. I believe that meeting their needs helps them to develop into emotionally secure children. I’ve seen it work with Ava. When babies aren’t spending their energy on crying and seeking attention, they can use that energy to grow and thrive.

I also believe in gentle discipline. It is challenging and hard at times, and I can’t say I haven’t lost my temper before, but I strive to discipline gently. I try to think about how I would want to be treated and honor my children with that same respect.

Just as I trusted in my body and my baby when I gave birth to Julian at home, I trust that I will instinctively know how to parent my children. That’s not to say that it’s always easy, but all of the above things have felt instinctual to me. If it feels right and makes sense, then I go with it. That, I believe, is parenting by instinct.

I believe that the time investment I make in my children’s lives while they are young will pay off tremendously as they grow older, and that by doing all of these things, I am creating a solid foundation on which to build a lifelong relationship.

I know some people question how attachment parenting can create independent children, but I have two children who are being parented in this way and they both are very independent. In fact, Ava is sometimes even more independent than I would like. ;) I believe that by meeting their needs, they come to learn that they can trust Jody (their dad) and me to be there for them when they need us and so they feel safe to venture out on their own.

Parenting is a challenging and amazing experience that takes time, energy and patience, but I believe this investment is all worth it. They make it all worthwhile.

Please take a moment to read some of the other carnival participants’ blogs (more will be added throughout the day):

• Half Pint Pixie: “I believe that breastfeeding is natural but not always easy.”
• Breastfeeding Mums: “I have a dream…a dream that involves breastfeeding.”
• Breastfeeding 1-2-3: “I believe in gentle discipline.”
• The Lactivist: “I believe that the things most worth doing in life are hard.”
• Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: “I believe in instinct.”
• Such Great Heights: “I believe that you don’t have to be a breastfeeding mother to support breastfeeding.”
• Hepititis_Epi: “Breastfeeding is worth it.”

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Any of you who read my blog regularly know that I am pretty opinionated passionate about a wide variety of topics. As I sat down to write this blog Wednesday night, I couldn’t decide which of my passions to discuss. I was looking for something that I have strong feelings about, but not something that would require a lot of time to write or research to back up my opinions (because I had a migraine most of the day and needed to get some good sleep).

I finally decided to write about children and food.

I’ve been doing a bit of reading the past week or so about artificial colors and other food additives and it’s got me thinking. I believe as a society, we are not feeding our children well.

Without looking up statistics, I feel safe in saying that our nation’s obesity rate is out of control. I also feel safe saying that too many children are on medication for hyperactivity and ADHD, etc.

We live in a culture where we demand so much from ourselves and our children and there are only so many hours in the day. As a result of not having enough time to make home-cooked, nutritious and healthy meals, we turn to fast food. We eat in our cars to save time. (I’m totally guilty of this and some of the other things I write about here. I’m not writing this to point fingers, but as a wake up call to all parents, myself included.)

Soda pop, candy and other junk food are readily available in many of our children’s schools. And school lunches are, for the most part, not a healthy way to go either. And even when parents pack their children’s lunches, the snack foods that many of them include are loaded with artificial colors and flavors and preservatives.

I believe that we need to slow down. I believe that we need to get back to the basics in cooking and feeding our families (as well as in many other areas). Perhaps we could start by using the crockpot for dinner if time is a big issue.

We need to teach our children to make healthy choices regarding foods (not sneak vegetables into all of their meals and assume that will help them develop healthy eating habits).

We need to be informed about the ingredients that are in the foods that we buy. Are they made from petroleum and/or tar? Have they been linked to hyperactivity? Have they been banned from other countries? Perhaps instead of medicating our children, we should try limiting their intake of food additives and see how it affects their demeanor.

I’ve been reading Healthier Food for Busy People by Jane Hersey and it’s been quite the eye-opener regarding many of the foods I eat or have eaten or given to my family in the past. I will be giving away a copy of this book in the future after I’ve had a chance to read it and review it, so stay tuned for that if you are interested in learning more. :)

I believe we have a lot of work to do and the first step is becoming more informed. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times. Knowledge is power. Eat it up. (Pun intended.) ;)

If you’d like to read more “What I Believe” posts, visit The Natural Mommy (where this round she wrote about circumcision - a post I could’ve nearly written myself. Oh wait, I already did.).

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